The Bad News Continues

In the wake of my friend, Omar's, death, my boss decided to dropped the ultimate bomb - I was being let go. My boss called me into his office and informed me that the budget wouldn’t support employment for me and one of my coworkers during the summer. I was a T.A. but during the summer I switched to part-time work until the new semester. He asked me if I had any other options and I told him that I didn't and that I still hadn't heard back from  the JET Program. My boss felt pretty terrible and left me alone for the rest of the day. After the meeting, I stepped into the stairwell and cried.

If losing your best friend to a drunk driver and losing your job weren’t bad enough, I also under performed during my thesis defense. As you can image, I was overwhelmed with terrible news and I did not complete the changes needed for my thesis defense. My thesis committee was kind, but I could tell that they were disappointed. During the deliberation, I struggled to hold back tears. I passed the defense, but I make immediate corrections and finish finalizing with them. However, they still congratulated me. One of my members even said, “Smile Gabie! This is a good thing. You’ve done great work! You just have to polish.” 

Afterward, I marched into the bathroom, right to the handicap stall, and Kim Kardashian cried. I preemptively prepared with my makeup bag in hand to reign in the mess. 

That's right! I choose grad school

Surreal Realization

This past week, I have been comforted by my friends, family members and co-workers regarding the loss of not only a close friend, but also a brotherly-like figure. Most people, I can assume, have a hard time understanding what it might be like to go through such a sudden loss. To be honest, I find it hard to believe myself - hence the title of this entry. I will try my best to put my feelings into words, so that I could help others that have gone through a similar situation. Yes, I understand that I was not this person’s family, but this was someone that I spoke to and saw regularly, and as you can see from my previous posts - someone who was very near and dear to my heart.

My amigo Omar was driving to a nearby park to play frisbee when he was hit by another car, which catapulted his car into a tree. He died on impact (he was wearing his seatbelt and his airbags deployed).  Later, we come to find out that the woman who hit his car, was actually fleeing from a previous hit and run, which is why the impact caused his car to hit the tree so hard. She also failed her field sobriety test (although her blood-alcohol content was below the legal limit) and admitted to the police that she was a recovering heroine addict and had used cocaine that morning. In the end, she was an idiot woman who, due to her terrible decisions that morning, ended the life of an amazing 28-year old. She is currently being charged with DUI manslaughter and vehicular homicide (a.k.a. they are throwing the book at her, as they should [see report here]).

For those who are informed of a sudden tragedy like this, I hope you are 1. not driving and 2. are close to a family member or significant other that can comfort you. I was fortunate to be home at the time when I received the phone call. Adrian, one his best friends, called and informed me that Omar was involved in a car accident. I quickly asked if Omar was alright, and he responded that he wasn’t. I inquired to which hospital he was in and that’s when Adrian told me that there was no hospital, because “He’s gone.” I can’t express how surreal this moment felt, I even asked if he was kidding or if it was an early April Fool’s joke. I have been feeling like this (surreal feeling) since. What’s comforting to know is that every one of his friends and family members that I have spoken to has felt the exact same way. There is lack of connection between our mind-brains and our mind-hearts. Mentally, we all understand that he’s gone, but in our hearts it just doesn’t seem real.

I attended his memorial service yesterday. I had selfishly hoped that it would be an open-casket wake so that I could have closure in seeing my friend one final time. Although his family opted for him to be cremated, I did feel a sense of closure and I got to say my final farewell because days earlier, Sean, his other best friend and roommate, asked if I would be willing to say a speech about Omar. I will forever be grateful for that opportunity.

One thing that the memorial that I kept saying was, “This is so Omar.” His family asked for us to be festive and have this moment to be a celebration of life. Flowers and decorations were lighthearted in nature. If you were a friend of Omar’s then you knew of his favorite movies (his posters were everywhere in his house) and his favorite sports team (he bled Miami Marlins colors). Therefore, at the memorial, his movie posters were present and the soundtracks to these movies were played in the background. People sent flowers that were arranged into baseballs or a Miami Marlins baseball field diamond. People were also asked to wear red, his favorite color, or Miami Marlin’s colors. He also had a passion for film making, which is what he was doing full-time, so they had his professional video camera set up on the side.

Although many people spoke during the service, his sister gave the most wonderful speech. I won’t go into detail, but she reminded us to cry, but not to suffer, because if we suffer then Omar suffers as well. I left the memorial knowing that my friend will always be with me. I was also moved by the positive imagine that he left on this earth - it’s aspirational. 

It’s still tough,  but I will take every day as a gift and continue to live according to His will. 

Therefore, I end this post with his comforting words:

You’re a sensitive flower…But you’re right, you never know when someone might die, and most people take that for granted. Take it as another learning experience in life. Live life to the fullest and don’t ever take people, especially your loved ones for granted, because you never know. 

Love you Omii!!!

The JET Program: The Interview

I was freaking out on the day of the interview! I spent the entire morning getting ready and making sure that I looked perfect. The Consulate General of Japan in Miami is in Brickell, which is about a good 30-40 minute drive depending on Miami traffic. Fortunately, I had been to the Consulate many times and, since my boyfriend at one point worked at a restaurant near it, there was no problem for me to find parking. Once at the Consulate, I rode the express, Tower of Terror elevator and waited my turn with fellow JET interviewees. They were running a little behind schedule, which was no problem for me, so I chatted up the JETAA representative who was there to help. I want to say that on the outside I looked calm and collected, but on the inside I was freaking. Thank God/Oprah/Tom Cruise/and Baby Jesus for the material of the dress and clinical strength deodorant. 

I recommend this brand for stressful moments

Before I knew it, I was called in for the interview. I sat in a chair facing three panelist. I was about to be grilled

Every question that was asked was expected and easy to answer. You'll need to know yourself, your application and your statement of purpose. I heard that there is usually a good cop/bad cop scenario in the interviews, but I didn't have that experience. I tried to be lighthearted and funny. For example, when they asked what I would like do in Japan, I told them I know Mt. Fuji is on everyone’s list, including mine, but that I read an article stating that they might have bungee jumping off of the Tokyo Sky Tree [see article here]. If so, I would be the first to sign up. They laughed at that, and I felt a bit more relaxed

They went through my application asking basic questions and then asked for a teaching demonstration on Halloween, my favorite holiday. I was to teach towards elementary children. I assume that I was supposed to use more Japanese, but I stuck with just basic English since I am teaching English after all. I began to draw on the board, but that didn't really seem to work, so I kicked aside the marker board and began to act out. I had the panalist repeat words after me and I gave out "candy" if they correctly said "trick or treat." I also gave a lot of praise because they'll attempt to mispronounce English words. As dumb as I felt, I'll admit I did a pretty great job. 

My teaching demo high was brought to a crashing low with the Japanese portion of the interview. My self-introduction was fairly easy. However, I also had to read a short paragraph. I sped through it but in my nervousness I did not pay attention to what I was reading. Afterwards, I sat outside and called my friend who had her interview earlier in the week and had lunch at a nearby restaurant. I did my best, but it was the toughest interview I had ever experienced. 

The JET Program: The Email

It was a Tuesday afternoon while I watched students give oral presentation as a graduate assistant for my professor's class, when I noticed my phone light up. It was a text message from my friend who also applied to the JET Program:

CHECK YOUR EMAIL!!!!

Without shame, I refreshed my email. There was a message from the Miami Consulate General stating that I had made it past the first round of applications and was asked to select an interview date. I could barely contain my joy as I not-so secretly text my loved ones about the news. The interview was on weekday, and my boss let me skip a day of class and work for the interview without any repercussions [谢谢!]. With the time and date set for my interview, I prepared for possible questions. I didn’t know anyone who previously interviewed, but I searched through forums and had a little secret help. 

Bitch! Refresh faster!

Next up, my interview outfit. I had enough BCBG suits in my arsenal from my days at Bloomingdale's. However, did I just want to be another person in a suit? It’s not that I don’t like suits or business attire but I really wanted to stand out.. Plus, the bulkiness of a suit on my petite body can be off putting. 

If I was going to be professional, it was going to be my way. Therefore, I searched online for the perfect “Michelle Obama” dress. I instantly fell in love with a long-sleeved knee-length dress in my favorite color of royal blue. It was conservative enough, but also hugged by body so that I didn't feel too matronly. I ditched my usual 5-6 inch pumps for low and sensible heels and added accessories and spanx. The next issue was my hair. At this time, my hair was about waist length and pinning it into a bun was a mission. It wasn’t just the length of my hair, but the thickness too. Moreover, the tattoo behind my ear doesn’t exactly scream “classy and professional.” Therefore, I had to fix my hair into a side and low ponytail with curled ends and a braid around the hairband. With the interview questions prepared and my outfit selected, I was ready for the JET interview. 

Ready!

The JET Program: The Application

In the midst of completing my final year of graduate school, I applied for the Japan Exchange and Teaching (JET) Program. It was no surprise to my friends and family, because they knew about my previous studies in International Relations and Asian Studies and well as my study abroad experience in Kyoto. Therefore, when the time came to complete the application, I had enough material in my resume (including my M.A. candidacy in Asian Studies) to know that I was a great match for the JET Program. However, there was one thing that really caught me by surprise: The JET Program Application.

The JET Program application is probably the most detailed and tedious application that I have ever had to cpmplete. Besides the basic information such as your name, nationality and so on, the application asks for all past medicines prescribed to you. In my situation, some of the medicines that were prescribed to me were repeated throughout the years, so I consolidated them into one single prescription. Within the application, I included a note that stated that some medicines were prescribed to me until the lab results were ready, which were mostly negative. Either way, while filling out the application, I couldn’t help but feel a little prang in my heart for those who have chronic illnesses I know it wouldn’t harm their changes, but I know it would be a little red flag in their application.

Do they need to know about these? No? Let's leave these out! 

The application needed to be filled out entirely, but it also had a set of requirements about how to file, staple and send the application correctly. The staple needed to be completely horizontal and one inch from the upper left corner. The staple also needed to be sprinkled with holy water and blessed by the Pope. Clearly, I’m joking, but the application does need to be in the correct order and they do give directions on where to put the staple. 

Stapled incorrectly? Disqualified!

If the application wasn’t crazy enough, you’ll definitely want to rip some hairs out when you have to write your two-page statement of purpose. The statement of purpose answers basic questions about why would be fit for the JET Program and so on. However, this is the moment where they really look into your English language skills. Therefore, if you think that because you’re a native English speaking that you’ll get in, think again. Within your statement of purpose, the JET Program is looking for interesting and relevant material as well as correct grammar and punctuation usage. This was probably this hardest portion of the application. If you are narcissistic, I’m sure this was a walk in the park, but those who are humble (me, or not me depending on who you ask) really struggled with writing about themselves.  There was a moment that I wanted to write, “I’m awesome, that’s why,” but that wouldn’t cut it. 

That smile that says, "Kill me now!"

Before the application due date, I asked my friend and coworker if she could check my statement of purpose. She majored in English and has amazing grammar skills. Let me tell you, when I received my statement of purpose with tracked changes, I was floored. She literally tore my statement of purpose apart and made it perfect! She rearranged my wording and made my statement of purpose flow from one point to the next. I made sure to thank her with a gift. My boss, who writes several books, also checked my statement of purpose. Once I received the O.K. from him, I knew that it was ready to send (and two weeks before the due date might I add). Therefore, my advice to anyone who is applying is to apply early, write your statement of purpose early, and get everyone and their mothers to read it. Read it yourself! Read it backwards, read it drunk, read it while you're working out, and have someone read it to you. Just read and revise until it answers all of the questions and flows.